What Advice Can You Give Me For A First Date?

  1. Lesson one of first dates is: don’t be late to your own date. A date is like a business deal that you’re trying to close. You’re trying to let your date know that you are the one for her and got what she needs. You need to convince her that she doesn’t have to go anywhere else. What would showing up late tell your date about you? It says you’re lazy, not punctual, and that you have other things more important than her. If you say you’re going to be there are 8:00pm, be there at 7:45pm. Show her how much you care about her without saying it, just show it.
  2. Don’t try too hard and just be yourself. Loosen up but don’t over do it. Sometimes, when someone is nervous, we tend to say things that we normally wouldn’t say. If you have a first date, that means you were interesting enough for her to say yes, so be cool. Women can always tell when you are over doing it and not acting like yourself. Don’t freeze up either, we are human as well. Don’t be too nice, or too polite, or too charming if it’s not you. Know who you are before you get to know someone else. And remember: too much of a good thing is bad.
  3. Why do guys feel it’s OK to get drunk on a first date? If you’re drinking with friends at a frat party, then go wild. But never on a date. I’m not saying you shouldn’t drink, but you have to know your limit and not make yourself look like a drunk. Again, you’re on a business date. Would you do the same in front of your boss? Just have one or two glasses of beer or wine and play it safe. It doesn’t matter if your drinking tolerance is 100 glasses, don’t do it. Make that first impression as a social drinker and not a drunk.
  4. On a first date, don’t jump the gun and try to hold her hand–even if you feel like marrying the girl. What is your date going to think? Instead, engage her by softly touching her arm or by placing your hand on her shoulder during conversation. If she does the same, you must be doing something good because that means she is interested and actively engaging you in conversation,  just like you should be doing. Don’t try to hold her hand and walk her down the aisle.
  5. When taking your date to a restaurant, don’t make it a place that requires your hands as utensils. Women also want to show you that they too are the one and don’t want to look sloppy. We would not see anything wrong with it, but they will. No ribs, crabs, or buffalo wings–save those for your fourth date, once the confidence level is higher.
  6. Build up suspense for a future date by not going in for the kiss. You’re just trying to get to know her, not let her know you’re just trying to get into her pants. Take your time and build yourself up. The time will come but not on the first date. Be respectful and honor boundaries, even if you think she is giving you clues that she wants to kiss you. Women love what they can’t have and a challenge–just like men. Don’t give it up so easy. And definitely don’t ask for a kiss. That seems too desperate and needy. Grow up.
  7. Lastly, do not text her after a date because this will make you seem too desperate. Women do not like desperate men, and if they do, you’re with the wrong woman. Wait and let her text you that night. If she doesn’t, then wait until the next day in the afternoon. Trust me, if she had a good time she will text you the same night. Respond with something simple and witty and that’s it.

Remember: We all have a little John Dapper inside us–we just need a little help.

J. Rush


One response to “What Advice Can You Give Me For A First Date?

  1. Great article. Tips 1-5 are right on… tips 6 & 7 are debatable.Can you add one thing between tip 1 and tip 2? Less is more… including smells! Women love the sexy smell of men’s cologne, however we don’t want to smell it before we get to you and we don’t want to smell it when you leave the room… spray it on your skin, not your clothes… that way, she will smell it on you when only when she’s close. That will make her want to stay close.
    -the mind of a woman

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